Thank You Bad Dudes

Thank you Greenbelt 5 armed robbers. Because of you, I have proven myself right. Mall security means shit in this country.

You have to admit – these robbers had a great plan. Either they’re evolving into something smarter or they have watched Ocean’s 11 too many times. Their plan had covered every possibility except for the two police aides who just happened to be in the mall when the robbers stormed the place.

And what about the mall security? 33 men – whose sole duty was to ensure safety within the mall – were nowhere in sight. But they had an excuse – they were thinking of the shoppers’ safety and thought it was best not to engage the robbers within mall premises. To a certain extent, they were right. Given the fact that no other civilian had been hurt (aside from the dude who was hit by a stray bullet), their idea may not have been a bad one.

But it gives me no comfort to know that every member of Ayala’s security won’t be there should I find myself in the middle of a crossfire in one of their malls. Also, isn’t it funny how NONE of them were there because they were thinking of everyone’s safety? How ironic.

It’s also stupid for Ayala representatives to give comments saying that their mall security had been taken by surprise because the robbers were disguised as members of the bomb squad. What the fuck were you expecting? Armed men with “ROBBERS” printed all over their shirts? Criminals will always find a way to outsmart law enforcement agents. The trick would be to stay one step ahead of them… always.

Of course, the next day other malls have declared to the public that they have increased security and are now on red alert. For the love of everything holy, why only do it now? If increasing security could have been done overnight then why wait until something like the Greenbelt incident to occur? And by the way, I went through an established mall on my way to work today and could have gotten in without so much of a fuss.

I could have brought a shiny revolver with me and the guard would still have said “hello, good evening” and let me through.

And what does being on “red alert” mean? It’s not like the robbers are going to rob another mall no less than 24 hours after scoring a big hit. If by “red alert” they mean intensified security and conducting thorough baggage checks and such then shouldn’t they be on “red alert” everyday?

It seems like Ayala malls will always be one of two things – the victim or the culprit. God must really hate the Ayalas.

*****

Also, thank you Mr. fan-punching-PBA-player for doing me a favor. I’ve always thought about punching a smart-ass basketball fan. Whoever that fan was, he had it coming.

He violated the first rule of trash-talking: Never trash-talk with a guy within punching distance.

Do not mess with a basketball player when you’re sitting on the sidelines. Be sure to move far away as you can then talk trash. Unless the player has a gun of course (seriously, this happened before), in which case you say nothing at all.

I know trash-talking has become a part of the sport. It’s unfortunate but a lot of people tend to forget that a ticket would only let them watch the game; those tickets aren’t sold so they can fuck with a player’s emotions.

Apparently, the fan who got the breath knocked out of him had a man-crush on Chris Tiu whose team was up against the player who smacked the hell out of him. Reports said the man had thrown in some mean comments after a hard foul by the now-suspended-for-the-rest-of-the-season player. Then mayhem ensued.

Oh if you could have only seen the fan’s face after he got the smackdown (who started acting tough after being surrounded by security). I can’t blame him though. If I got my ass kicked on national television and wasn’t even able to do anything about it, I too would walk away with my head up high then call my mommy and have her kiss my boo-boo.

I’m not saying the player was right. He was wrong and suspending him was the right thing to do. Here’s what I’m really trying to say:

• Just because the player was wrong doesn’t mean the other party was right.
• PBA officials could have at least backed their player up by saying it wasn’t entirely his fault. I may not know exactly what words had been said out there but I doubt that it was a compliment.
• The fan lost all his rights the moment he threw in the first insult.
• PBA officials should, for the lack of a better expression, grow some balls. They say they don’t want the PBA to look anything but fan-friendly. But with fans like that, guess what – you are anything but wholesome. This isn’t a case of the customer being always right.

I just learned that the fan I’m talking about is an Atenean named Alain Katigbak and that the Ateneo community would be in full support of Katigbak filing a complaint. I guess Ateneans support each other regardless of who is wrong or right.